Monday, September 9, 2013

Let me save you the trouble

When I was a little girl on an airplane for my umpteenth time there is a story about my.... abruptness.  It goes something like this:

The flight attendant is going around and talking with the kids on the plane, asking their names, how old they are, how they're doing and if they've flown before.  Apparently, by the time she got to me I had heard her spiel a few times and before she even got past "Hi!" I said, "I'm Megan, I'm 2, I'm fine, and I've flown before" and continued about my business.  My understanding is that the flight attendant was a bit taken aback.

Apparently 20 some odd years later (okay, okay, 28 years later, but who's counting?) I feel the need to essentially be that same snotty 2 year old.  I would like to wear a sign that says the following:

"6 months; no he's not; thanks, we think so too."  Because I think I am a bit of a record on repeat as the same things are almost always the start of a conversation.
  • "How old is he?"
  • "Is he sleeping through the night?"
  • "He's so cute!"
I don't think you can run into any stranger friendly parent/person that doesn't strike up conversation in almost that exact same rhythm.  Mind you, I don't have a problem discussing the lack of sleep I'm still suffering, I love strangers telling me my little boy is cute (who doesn't?) but I feel like if I were to wear the sign at least, it would get us past those intro questions and on to more important discussions like the color of your baby's poo, milestones, and whether you think going dairy free really helps.  Maybe I'm just bitter and irritable because I'm not sleeping through the night or because I'm not able to comfort myself with cheese.

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Here's some fun news...

...I responded to a plea for blog posts from a facebook group I'm a part of - Breastfeed, Chicago!.  I submitted, and either through lack of entries or being truly interested what I had to say - they published my blog post!  Woohoo.  So if you're interested, you can check it out here.

http://breastfeedchicago.wordpress.com/2013/08/26/it-gets-better-no-really-it-does/

How fun is that?

Friday, August 9, 2013

Going out of my mind

DISCLAIMER - I have been sitting on this post for a while, hoping some of the crazy would pass... it has not.  So, I figure why not do a brain-dump to see if I'm not alone.

All day I think of things that I want to write about ... all day I build up topics and words and sentences to share what I'm thinking ... and as soon as I sit down to actually put those ideas down, POOF!  They are out of my head and all my grand ideas are faint memories that I can't pull up.  I know that most of the things I'm thinking about these days are (in no particular order):

  • Why does my baby hate me?  (This stems from the belief that he doesn't smile at me ... EVER... John assures me that I'm crazy and that he does in fact smile at me just as much)
  • When will Colin start sleeping more at night?
  • How long will I have to wear these damn pads in my bra?
  • How can I throw out 90% of everything in my house?
  • Do I do enough to advance Colin?  Do we play enough, do we read enough, do we do enough tummy time... do we <> enough (see a trend?)?
  • What else can I google to see if Colin is on track or falling behind?
  • Does he smile enough and engage socially enough for his age?
  • When will we have enough money to make improvements to our condo?
It's just a never ending stream of consciousnesses that kind of makes me feel like a crazy person.

This is what I've learned about motherhood so far... it has made me certifiably a CRAZY person.  I was on the cusp for most of my life - a delicate balancing act of being out of my mind and a calm/laid back kind of person.  I'm now dangerously close to losing that sense of calm and living only in crazy.  

I think what's really been on my mind lately was a topic that I heard on the radio the other day - "what are you like in your secret life?"  Essentially, what kind of person do you portray to the world, compared to the person that you really are inside, and in my case, how I really am with John and Colin when I get home.

Unfortunately, I think I live a secret life.  Maybe it's not so secret, I'm probably not nearly as good about hiding it as I think I am.  In my outward life, I'm a pretty laid back person and mom.  I don't stress with knowing he'll get sick (his first cold wasn't nearly as terrible as I thought it was going to be in all honesty) or picking toys up off the floor and handing them back to him... and I definitely find myself talking so casually about things and not seeming like I'm overreacting.  I make jokes about his crying (first timers be warned, I will usually pull out the "oh my goodness, what did you do to Colin?  He NEVER cries.... I can't believe you made him cry".  It keeps me from crying).  I've had other people tell me how "calm" I am, and are surprised since he's my first.  

In reality --- I freak about nearly everything.  I freak about if we are doing enough with Colin, if we are not good parents because we aren't with him 100% of everyday all the time.  I get in and freak out about how much stuff we have and how much room we don't.  I freak about having an old kitchen, I freak about having broken floors that need to be redone, I freak about laundry, I . freak . about.... everything.  I think I'm driving John out of his mind since I come home and just lose my sh*t.  

Does this happen to everyone?  Does everyone take the crazy train when they become parents?  Everything that was on your mind before, just becomes that much more intense?  Then with the addition of worrying about another human.... oof.  I'm going to blame a little bit on sleep deprivation - the rest is just me I think.  

What kind of 'secret' life do you lead?

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Brown Eyed Boy

So, a lot of people say that Colin looks a lot like me.. now, when he was BORN, we thought he looked a lot more McDonald (maybe mostly Katie) but I think it's safe to say that Colin is starting to look a bit more like me every day.  I have a feeling that the main reason for that is that we have the same eyes and that's a very dominant feature which leads everyone to think he is my clone.  Otherwise, if you look at the rest of him - long fingers, long toes, long legs, amazing eyelashes ... those are 100% John.

But, for fun, I'm attaching baby pictures of me, and some baby pictures of John.  Enjoy!

Baby Pictures of me:

Doing medicine mouth/face...  

 Me at 5 months old

Being much more successful in a lake than Colin was 

  
 This picture of Colin is when he was 3 months old - I'm guessing I'm around the same age?


 I'm older in this picture than Colin currently is, but I think I'll see that face in the future


This makes me chuckle because we are in ALMOST the same position


Loving the lake - I hope Colin is as receptive!

Now for some photos of John!  


That's Katie on the left, John on the right - we've already discussed the crazy head shape he and Colin share (see evidence below)

John on the top, Colin on the bottom.. Freaky!  Their profiles are so similar too!


New dad's Looking at their sons (dodged a bullet on John's inability to grow facial hair..ha..kidding)

John just hanging out in his swing in the background :)

Cruising around in their walkers

The frown in this one looks familiar.... Not that Colin ever frowns

 Crawlers!

I think it's fun to compare baby pictures and see how Colin is constantly changing, and I think constantly going between the two of us.  If he were to lose his big brown eyes, I think he'd look more like John - but I'm pretty sure those are going to stick with him.

Funny how nature works.... I'd like to think he got the best of both of us.  Love that kid.

4 months is the new black

Or at least that's what I've heard.  Something like that?  I'm making that up.

Either way, here we are.  Colin is 4 months... and let's be honest by the time I managed to get this written down, he's actually 4.5 months old, and downright coming up on 5 months.  But that's okay.  There were lots of pictures, lots of adventures leading up to now, and I suppose I'll catch you up a little bit before diving into the nitty gritty of what's going on. 

We went to the beach!  We rented an umbrella to keep us in the shade, and we rocked out the beach.  It was fun.  Colin got to put on his adorable swim trunks and rash guard t-shirt, and I threw on my pre-pregnancy bikini (yikes!).  I did keep on my dress, although the top fit a WHOLE lot differently than I remembered on both my swimsuit AND my dress, oops.  But, Colin did get his feet in the water (although in the picture below you can tell he's a bit unsure).  I'm looking forward to going back and getting him more used to it.  Hopefully the weather breaks and it's warm enough again before the season ends!

 Colin and I siting at the water's edge, getting used to it - luckily the water is pretty shallow so it's not as cold as some parts of Lake Michigan

Laying on our blanket under the umbrella

Just the two of us - chillin'

This picture below has nothing to do with the beach, and I'm not entirely sure of when it was taken.  But, I like it because Colin and John are looking a little bit matchy.

 The boys

What else did we do... we took our first road trip.  Our friends, who John saw get married in Cancun had a local wedding reception in O-h-i-o.  So that meant that I was able to celebrate them, and that meant that we would go and visit my dad in Dayton before heading up to Wapakoneta.  We were able to get a photo op in the cradle/rocker that my grandpa built, and multiple generations have slept in.  Colin did surprisingly well in the car.  On the way down one of us was essentially always with him in the back seat and he only cried for little bouts.  He slept most of the way home too, which was excellent.  Just a lot of "Itsy Bitsy Spider" to distract him on the way home when we weren't able to get off the freeway and he was SOOO done wit hthe car.  We brought him to the reception for a little bit, to show him off to Joel and Heather -- and then my dad was more than happy to come and pick him up so that he could spend the evening with him.  Strangely enough it didn't take much convincing.  Ha.

 The three of us at the reception

 My dad had made mention that there are not a lot of "grandpa" things out there -- so of course I had to pick this one up for him.

 Once we got back to the city, we swung by to catch the end of the US Soccer game, and Colin was so excited to be out of his car seat - this was the biggest smile we've seen in a while


Later in the week, we were back to beach volleyball so I managed to get a quick shot of the three of us.  We don't get many pictures of us as a family, so I wanted to share.  Colin was conked out...


This weekend, while John got in a round of golf, I managed to get some 4 month pictures in.  I have to say, it's next to impossible to get them without a set of extra hands.  He is SO freaking wiggly.  He loves his feet, doesn't like to sit still, and puts EVERYTHING in his mouth.  Once he watched me put the sticker on his belly.... he got excited and was able to pull it off and stick it in his mouth.  Yeah, it's awesome.  

 I know that Colin looks drunk on the bottom one, I assure you he isn't...

1- I found the sticker; 2-I can kick higher than the aardvark; 3 - I hate you, Mommy, for making me wear all these ridiculous things and then take my picture

Now the "OMG we have a 4 month old who actually is present in the world and gets frustrated and/or giggly and/or needs to be entertained all the time".

The other day, we decided to finally move Colin into his own room.  We have had his crib set up since he was born, ready to go, but we just hadn't made the switch.  Let's be honest, most of it was from my selfish need of not wanting to have to go into his room to get him when he was hungry and waking up multiple times a night  (I think that's completely valid by the way).  I started thinking that perhaps we were getting into a bad cycle where he was waking me up, I was waking him up, and it would go round and round.  I was hoping (envision me with eyes closed and fingers crossed) that if we moved him into his own room, we could break that and he would finally start sleeping through the night.  Knowing what I know now, it was probably a pipe dream.  In all fairness, it's been two/three (?) nights, so you can't really judge yet.  But, it's not working out as smoothly as I had hoped.  

The first night, I look down into the monitor and realize that I can see the bottom of his footed pajamas... Umm... we laid him down on his back.  Now, I realize he is a squirmy little guy - he rotates in anything he's sleeping in and has for months.  So, I don't expect him to be in the same position I left him in, but I never see the bottom of his feet - so John checks on him, and sure enough he's semi on his belly.  When I picked him up the next day at Julia's, she mentioned that he was really rolly-polly and going from back to belly.  I thought for SURE she got confused and switched it up and meant belly to back.  Fun fact, she wasn't lying.  She realized that I hadn't seen it yet, so she set up the floor and we coaxed him into rolling.  Umm.. yeah, he rolls both ways, back and forth, back and forth.  The best part, he tends to get kind of pissed if he ends up on his belly..... Even though he does it to himself.  Ha.  (**Disclaimer, this is the first official milestone that I haven't witnessed first, and Julia did a great job of setting the scene to get it to happen again, and really didn't make it seem like something that I missed out, and it was actually really good)

That takes us to night two, where we are awoken to a very sudden and unexpected cry from Colin, where he had rolled over on his belly and didn't realize that he could just lay his head to the side, relax, and fall back asleep.  He thought he needed to keep his head up in the "tummy time" position.  And of course he forgets he can roll back over, so he gets uber-mad and we have to go in and calm him down and sometimes roll him back.  It was a long night.

So we still aren't sleeping, but last night he only woke up only a couple of times, instead of every hour from 2-6.... so that's a plus, right?  Ugh.. I can't wait for him to sleep for longer periods of time.  It's exhausting when he isn't sleeping longer than 3 hours (and really only averaging 2 hrs at a time), and while we are able to get him to go back to sleep sometimes without nursing, most of the time the only remedy is feeding him - which means I'm on the hook.  Bummer.

Otherwise, I think life is moving along pretty smooth.  Colin is doing well, growing as he should.  He's still a skinny minny (14lbs 4 oz at his 4 month check up) but loooong (at 26") which is exactly how we expected it to be.  

He likes to giggle - at everyone BUT me, he likes to smile - at ALMOST anyone BUT me, and he likes to eat -- from no one BUT me, haha, kidding.  He actually takes bottles pretty well from nearly anyone.  He is a pretty serious little boy though - looking at things and taking them all in.  Not a very "carefree" baby.  But, he's still super cute, so I'll take it!  It makes me appreciate the giggles I can get out of him even more.

I think I probably overwhelmed with words, so I should get going.  There has just been so much going on and so many posts that I've wanted to write - and it's all getting condensed into this which doesn't even scratch the surface of everything I want to say.  

But, this is good.  He's 4 months, going on 5... we'll start thinking of solids in the upcoming months which is crazy and exciting.  Summer will end, fall will come, and I can't wait to see what he's doing next!  

Thursday, June 27, 2013

25% of a year complete - Time FLIES!

Ladies and gentleman (I'm pretty sure John is the only gentleman that reads this, and that's only occasionally if twitter or ESPN are running low) we have reached the quarter of a year mark.... three months.... 25%....phew.  Time has flown by which I realized it would, but still wasn't quite ready for it.

What has three months brought us?  Let's see -

Things we have done:

  • Our first Cub's game
  • Ridden on the L
  • Gone to the zoo
  • Attended Rib Fest
  • Started making friends with Wylie and Julia
  • Stayed at hotel
  • Met the Hoyt family
  • Went to the Shedd and saw jellies, sharks, and penguins!


Things Colin has accomplished:

  • Rolled over tummy to back
  • Accidentally rolled over from back to tummy
  • Grabbing at toys --- and trying to put them in his mouth (theme of his life)


Things that Colin loves:

  • Putting his hands in his mouth
  • Pulling mommy's hands to his mouth
  • Eating and cuddling with swaddle blankets
  • Row Row Row Your Boat
  • Play mat with dangling toys
  • Standing - loooooves to stand
  • Watching the Blackhawks - all that red on the screen is fascinating
I know there are more things, but I feel like that's probably enough for the folks out there --- since I'm sure I'm a little bit more obsessed with the adorable/awesome that is Colin.  

Three months also brought me back to work, which I think we are both handling pretty well.  I think we are both getting better at understanding it.  I think it's helped that we have had a lot of people around so he's not quite freaked out about John or me not being there during the day.  It's not quite as traumatic.  He gets to do fun things like go to the park, go for walks, and play with a big kid (i.e. a baby 4 months older).  But I sure do love coming home and picking him up and hanging out with him in the evening.  The TV isn't nearly as exciting, when all I want to do is have him look at me and giggle at me.

He's gotten much better with not crying (still have bouts, but it's definitely improving).  We've managed to get him to restaurants and gatherings and he does remarkably well.  For Jennifer's wedding we went to the rehearsal and the dinner following and he met a ton of family - Uncle Bob, Uncle Russ, Glenna, Aunt Linda... Great Grandma Anne... And he handled it like a champ.  I can't wait for him to just be a smiley happy baby, but I think I'm starting to realize that he really is just a bit of a serious kid.  He does laugh, he does smile, but he also just stares really intently at things and people like he's trying to figure it out.  Of course, it's because he's brilliant, right?  Haha.... 

Well, I think the more important part of this post is the pictures, not the running commentary.  


Crazy to see the different three months can make


Sure, most of these are kind of the same thing, but I couldn't choose just one, so I decided to make a collage so that I didn't overstep any one's patience

I just can't believe how much he has changed in three months.  I knew it would be a crazy change, but wow.  He looks so much more like a person than he did, and he is so much more alert.  I just love it!  We bought the big bear because he's already outgrown all of his other stuffed animals to do any sort of comparison... so we thought this one might last a little bit longer.  

Here's the net three more, and the three after that.  Can't wait to see what he learns and discovers next!!

And just for fun, Colin meeting his Great Grandma, and then the two of us at Jennifer's wedding.  Hard to believe she's 92 -- she looks pretty spry.  Even got out on the dance floor, crazy old lady (possible emphasis on crazy?).


He wasn't wearing pants -- that's what's awesome about being a baby


Such a handsome boy in his suit


Grandma Anne and me at Jennifer's Wedding


Tuesday, June 25, 2013

The first of many....

....firsts that I will not privy to.  I knew it was going to happen.  I was prepared for being sad about it, but working really hard on not being "jealous" when the time came.  I think I'm handling it as well as I thought I would - knowing that when we go as a family it is "our first" instead of just "the first".  

But I'm not going to lie ... I'm still bummed out about it.